Inclusiveness--Conflict

**Responding to Conflict**

**Aim:** Students will learn several different ways of responding to conflict, and will think critically about the styles’ strengths and weaknesses.


 * Materials: **


 * Chart Paper or Board


 * Do Now: **


 * Read the following out loud to the students:

“Imagine you are changing classes and walking up the stairs. By accident, you step on the heel of a student who you are not friends with, causing her to trip and drop her books. The student gets in your face and says, ‘Look what you did, clumsy. Now YOU’RE gonna pick up my books for me!’ What do you do/how do you respond?


 * Students should spend a few minutes doing a short written reflection about their response. When they are done, ask students to share their answers in the group, while you record the responses on the board.

**Activity A:** What are the responses?


 * Either ahead of time on chart paper, or on the board, write down “9 common responses to conflict”

1. Appeal to Authority

2. Giving In

3. Negotiation

4. Humor

5. Yelling or Violence

6. Distraction

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%; margin-left: 1.25in; text-indent: -0.25in;">7. Avoidance or Delay

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%; margin-left: 1.25in; text-indent: -0.25in;">8. Talking it Over

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%; margin-left: 1.25in; text-indent: -0.25in;">9. Denial- Pretending Nothing’s Wrong


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%; margin-top: 0in;">Briefly go over what each response means, using the Do Now and the student’s offered responses as examples.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">**Activity B:** Role Plays


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%; margin-top: 0in;">Below are 9 different small skits. Rotate the students to act each skit out, and then have a discussion to identify what kind of response to conflict the skit showed.


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Skit #1 **

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jack, Kelly, and Joe are working on a group project and Jack is late to hand in his part of the work.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jack: (rushing to get his part done) Sorry guys! I didn’t mean to make us late.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Kelly: Jack, you are always late! What are we going to do with you.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Joe: There is nothing we can do. Jack will ALWAYS be late- for everything!

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Kelly: (smiling) True, true. Jack, weren’t you born late? I heard your mom was a week overdue.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jack: (laughing) You know it. Alright guys, I got it.


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Skit # 2 **

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">//Amy and Chris are walking out of class, after their teacher just yelled at Chris in front of everyone//.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Amy: Hey Chris, you alright?

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Chris: Um, uh huh. Hey! I heard we’re getting free time in gym- want to play a game of one-on-one?

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Amy: Oh, sure. Just so you know we can talk about what happened if you want…

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Chris: You are so gonna lose this game! Hey, what are you doing after school?


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Skit # 3 **

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Paul and Theresa are leaving school at dismissal when they notice a circle of students on the corner with two kids fighting in the middle.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Paul: Look Theresa, a fight!

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Theresa: Who is it? Can you see?

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Paul: It looks like it might be Tommy. I heard kids over lunch saying they were going to jump him.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Theresa: Hurry Paul. We need to go tell a teacher or the security guard.


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Skit # 4 **

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Already late for class, Chandra and Pablo were both in the computer lab trying to print their homework out last minute. One computer finally became available, and Pablo went to use it.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Chandra: What are you doing Pablo? I was here first so I should get to use this computer.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Pablo: Well, I didn’t see you here, so it looks like it’s fair game. And since I’m sitting here it looks like I’ll be the one to use it.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Chandra: (walking away, angry) Fine then. (muttering to herself) I can’t stand him. I was totally here first.


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Skit # 5 **

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jesse and Claire are on their way out to lunch.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jesse: Claire, are you mad at me? You know I didn’t spread any rumors about Danny this morning.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Claire: Jesse, Al told me that you told him that Danny was popping pills this morning.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jesse: What!? No! I meant the vitamins that Danny takes, not drugs! No wonder you’re so mad…

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Claire: Oh, //vitamins.// Now I understand. Well maybe you should explain this to Al—and to Danny!


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Skit # 6 **

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Christina and Desiree in the cafeteria.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Desiree: I can’t believe you are spreading rumors about me Christina.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Christina: What? I don’t get it Desiree! What rumors?

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Desiree: (turning her back on Christina) Forget it. You know what I’m talking about- I’m not even discussing it with you at this point (walks away).

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Christina: Wait! What rumor?


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Skit # 7 **

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Peter and Jeffrey during A.M. advisory.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Peter: Oh hey Jeffrey. Sorry I didn’t call last night. I know you needed that HW assignment but I was really busy helping my little sister out with something,

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jeffrey: Oh, it was no problem.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Peter: Really? You’re sure you’re ok?

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jeffrey: (walking away) Oh yeah- I’m fine. (to himself) Great. Now I have missing homework. I’m never trusting Peter again.


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Skit # 8 **

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Josie and Alexis are down in the locker room.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Josie: Hey Alexis. I heard you’re trying to get with Steven.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Alexis: Yeah, so?

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Josie: (stepping in closer to Alexis) So Steven is MY boyfriend.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Alexis: (stepping in closer to Josie and raising her voice) Well maybe you should buy him a leash because he’s not acting like your boyfriend.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Josie: (raising her voice) Girl you must be crazy talking to me like that! I’m about to smack you if you don’t back off.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Alexis: I’m not going anywhere- and you better expect me to smack you back.


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Skit #9 **

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jake and Ross both want to use the exercise bike during gym class.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jake: Hey Ross, you’ve been on that thing for 20 minutes. How about giving me a chance?

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Ross: I promise I’ve only been on for 5 minutes- Andrea was on it before me. Would it be okay with you if I used it for 5 more minutes, and then you can have it for the rest of class?

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">Jake: Yeah, that’s cool. Let me know when you get off.

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">//Answers// //From Role Play//:

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">1. Humor

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">2. Distraction

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">3. Appeal to Authority

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">4. Giving In

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">5. Talking it Out

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">6. Avoidance or Delay

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">7. Denial

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">8. Yelling or Violence

<span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%;">9. Negotiation


 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%; margin-top: 0in;">Discussion Questions: What are some positive responses? Negative? What situations would you be more likely to respond with violence? When might you feel compelled to talk it out instead?
 * <span style="color: #000000; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS',Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: 130%; margin-top: 0in;">Think about the last time you were in some kind of conflict. How did you respond? What if you used another kind of response? How would that have changed the outcome? Share in group or with partner.